Instructions Page 1         Instructions Page 2         Instructions Page 3         Instructions Page 4         Instructions Page 5         Instructions Page 6         Final Instructions

Admin Login
Timetobuzzthetower received a package from Tim and 011iver containing some MBILF swag. He got a clock that was supposed to go along with the mug I received, but they split them up to spread the love around some more.

Now the 6:45 clue makes sense. If you were to set the clock to 6:45, the hands would point at the heart and the fire symbol. Put them together and you get the username "heartburn".

Now for the password: take these when you get <heartburn>. This is where it gets a bit tricky. There are all sorts of different things you can take for heartburn, from the generic term of antacids to specific brand names, like Alka-Seltzer and Rolaids. Based on the password to the Members Only page (which actually seems to be unprotected now), we were trying everything in lowercase. My initial list of passwords contained 26 different possibilities. When none of those worked, we went back and started playing around with uppercase in both the username and password. Still no joy.

I even asked @TimScribbles what he had taken after eating 011iver's muffins, hoping to get a clue as to what we should be taking for heartburn. All I got back from him was that he took nothing (because 011iver reads his tweets). Thanks Tim, that wasn't helpful at all. Luckily, someone looked through their medicine cabinet and gave us a list of what they took - including TUMS.

Yes, TUMS in all uppercase letters. This, of course, is the password to the Admin only site. And, of course, I have a problem with it in that, unless we have a specific hint pointing at non-standard capitalization, we tend to think of either all lowercase or just an initial uppercase letter. I now know that TUMS the brand name tends to be all uppercase letters, but I'd be willing to bet that most people would write it as Tums if they were doing capitalization. If you do a Google search on TUMS, both Tums and TUMS shows up on the list of pages on the website - so even website designers don't always think of it as TUMS. I definitely would have been happy if the password had been "tums" and could have dealt with "Tums" as the password as well. "TUMS" just annoys me and even my non-ARG friend thought that it was an poor choice. Oh well, live and learn - double check the official names of products if they are used as a password.
username: heartburn
password: TUMS
The Admin page shows the MBILF access logs for the month of May. Most of it is system checks, login information, uploading/deleting of pages, new user registrations, etc. But there are a few interesting bits. I've broken the events up per day, color coded, and added descriptions so you can see what's going on easier. §

Holy crap! Carol Coldoil disabled, banned and deleted Lugnut! If you check out his RFF profile, you'll see his name has been changed to Lugnut Mark2 (the new AI that Coldoil uploaded) and the creepy robobaby picture is gone. His new avatar just says ADMIN. Looking back through the logs, there is some slightly odd behavior by Lugnut on May 25th and May 27th. On the 25th, he uploads his Last Will and Testament and logs into MBILF for seemingly no reason while Coldoil is logged in. Then on the 27th, Lugnut uploads an ERROR page. One minute later, and Coldoil is removing Lugnut from the system. Obviously we now need go to check what Lugnut was doing that pissed off Coldoil so much.

Update: By the way, I registered a new account on MBILF so I could see what the 'newuserlogindisabled' email was. It states that due to 'site maintenance' the password for the member's only section has been disabled. Probably because LugnutMark2 doesn't know how to fix the database. §
Last Will and Testament of Lugnut
At first glance, the Last Will page looks to be Morse Code. But there are too many dots and dashes per each character, so it's not valid Morse. However, if you replace the dots with 0 and the dashes with 1, you get a message encoded in binary. §

Wow, so Lugnut caught Coldoil doing something potential fatal for all robotkind. My roboporn sex slave theory isn't looking so stupid now, is it? Lugnut doesn't say who he's talking to, but if it's a server bot on MBILF, there can't be too many possibilities. RamSavage maybe? Someone with access over on RobotFriendFinder?

Lugnut mentions /paris.html, but there isn't one in the root directory of MBILF, or in the /users or /users/admin directories. Looking at the source code of the will, Lugnut points to another directory with two images in it: and metrics2.jpg. I swear I had found a passworded paris.html page under the /metrics directory when we first started searching, but it's no longer there. :(

But there is one password protected page we don't have a login for: lugnutERROR.html. This must be what the metric puzzles are for.
The Metrics Puzzles
Metric Puzzle #1 is a diagram of a relatively simple circuit where we have to find the value of I. If you do the math, you get a value of I=1000 A.

Metric Puzzle #2 is a set of logic gates. Lysithea was nice enough to post the explanation of the logic gate solve of 10101. §

Putting together the two metric puzzles solves, we get the username and password of the ERROR page.
username: 1000
password: 10101
This is last page that the original Lugnut was able to upload onto MBILF before Coldoil zapped him. It's a corny joke about Beethoven decomposing which links to an even creepier video of Lugnut in the robo-baby body singing Every Rose Has Its Thorn. I'm really not sad that the robo-baby is dead, although I will miss Lugnut the AI.

If this message has any deeper meaning, I don't know what it is. We don't have any open logins since we can't find a paris.html page anywhere. It seems strange that his last communication would only be a joke and the very odd video without having some hidden message, but who knows. If there is a hidden message, maybe we'll find instructions later on how to decode it.
Gospel #2
Pastor Ned "The Crackpot" Ludd has another Gospel posted on his YouTube. This time he talks about the FacePlaces and the MyPlaces and the 2XL. He even has pretty pictures of computers and frogs with tea kettles during the video. I wonder if he puts them in there or if Jonny the webguy does. Either way it's kinda funny. §

I probably should say that I broke down and emailed Paster Ned the other day to complain about my treatment at Prospect Park during my date with 011iver. He didn't say much back to me, besides that fact that I was confused and in the grasp of Satan. Because he has such a large congregation, he can't respond as much as he would like over email, but said he would address my email in an upcoming sermon. I can't wait. §
011iver Is Depressed
The robophobe breaking up our date really affected 011iver. He's become all depressed. Tim has even resorted to starting a discussion on RobotFriendFinder asking for advice from others who have run into robot-haters. One of the bots who responded was 2XL. I wonder if thats the same 2XL that once belonged to Reverend Nutter.

I really hope 011iver feels better soon. It sucks knowing he's all sad and that nothing we do is making him feel any better.
Pastor Ned Responds
As I said up above, I wrote Pastor Ned an email about my date with 011iver getting ruined. True to his word, he recorded a video response and was even nice enough to post my original letter up on his website. §

Pastor Ned cracks me up. I love how upset and flustered he gets. I can't stop giggling. And the text that goes up while he's talking: "web-a-log," "messive, "Email-uhline". Total awesome-sauce. And the squash! Don't get me started on the squash!

You may have also noticed that a screen shot of Pastor Ned's Personal Directory was inserted into the video. I wonder if this is Jonny or if some AI is really coming down the electrical grid and adding this stuff into the video.
Ned Ludd Personal Directory
The personal directory of Pastor Ned is at You can tell its an absolutely awesome directory because it utilizes the <blink> and <marquee> tags! Sadly there aren't any animated unicorns decorating the page. But I don't know if God allows Pastor Ned to believe in unicorns. Maybe I should ask him.

Pastor Ned has three very important things in his personal directory: a confidential mp3, a zip file full of photos, and a link to the hamster dance. Maybe because the hamster dance page has so many animated .gifs on it, he didn't feel the need to add them on his page. But you do need animated .gifs, Pastor Ned. You need a lot of them!

There are five photos in the zip file: angry.jpg,, epic.profile.jpg, pointing.concerned.jpg and timemag.jpg. Looks like Pastor Ned had his own little photoshoot. Could it be he's planning on broadly marketing GodHatesRobots? You can tell he wants to be on Time Magazine. Somehow I don't quite see them declaring him the Man of the Year. He couldn't even stuff the ballot box to win Most Influential Person since he hates computers so much. But we wish him the best of luck.

The confidential audio is really surprising. Pastor Ned is practically crying as he starts to talk about how, in fact, he once had a robot as a friend. But something terrible must have happened because Pastor Ned can't talk about it. Hmm, what could have happened? Could his robot friend been dragged into the robo-porn business? I bet that would upset a man of God like Pastor Ned. Or maybe it's something as simple as his robot friend ran off with his wife. Or went robo-crazy and killed all of Pastor Ned's family like a Terminator. If I had to put money down, I'd think I bet on robo-porn. §
011iver Calls Ram
Tim, in his never-ending quest to get 011iver out of his funk, suggested that 011ie call RamSavage to get some advice. I told 011ie that he should ask how to pick up girls in the City and maybe how to dance. He must have liked my idea because that's what he asked RamSavage.

Ram puts up her advice pretty quickly, because right after Tim tweeted that 011ie had called, the audio was up on the website. There was another audio file from a bot called P.L. as well, but that wasn't nearly as interesting as what Ram had to say to 011iver. §

So I totally called it: Lugnut was in love with RamSavage. And she knows that he's been killed and now is all depressed herself. Great, two depressed robots and I don't know how to help either one of them. At least Ram gave us a better hint as to where we could find that paris.html page Lugnut was talking about before. First, she mentions RobotFriendFinder. But I had searched all over that for either /paris/ or /paris.html. It wasn't until I listened to her answer again for the transcription that I noticed that she says 'slash' twice - indicating that the first bit is the directory. From there it was easy to find

Oh joy! Oh rapture! Another passworded page. Forgive me for a moment while I go killed a kitten. This one has a little message for us that says "Hi. I knew you'd find it." So, what's the password? Not any of the ones we already have. It's gotta be related to the death video of Lugnut. Ram mentions flowers, so that could be talking about the song title Every Rose Has Its Thorn. There's also some very odd flashes in the video that could be something like Morse or binary, but they go by really quick so it's gonna be a pain in the ass to decode if that's the case. There's also the idea from the joke that Beethoven is decomposing and so is playing his music backwards. So the password could be backwards as well. Way too many possibilities to make it easy. Obviously time to start a new password attempt list.

Okay, so it looks like the flashes are the way to go. Dante was good enough to output the number of frames per each section of the flashes so that we didn't have to rely on our eyes picking up each flash. From there it wasn't that hard to decode and figure out the user:pass §
username: poison
password: 1988
We'll Always Have Paris
The Paris page has a lovely ASCII drawing of a hand an the Eiffel Tower. It also has a countdown which is scheduled to go off in 8 days. So we're going to have to check back on Saturday, June 6th around 10pm to find out what Lugnut planned. The message in the javascript when the countdown ends now says "To quote another famous robot... 'I'll be back'" - so maybe Lugnut hid a copy of himself somewhere and will come back from the dead next Saturday. I hope so. I also hope he doesn't jump back into creepy robo-baby because, I'm sorry, it freaks me out!
Deep Blues
011iver is in a serious funk. He's been sitting on the couch, watching Rocky and eating potato chips, Fiber One and McDonald's drinks. By the way, I think I'm going to start a new game: Find the McDonalds reference. I can name three so far. What about you? Anyways, back to 011iver. Tim is useless. He doesn't even seem to notice that 011iver needs serious help. Luckily, once again Chuck is there to point out the obvious. I don't think either Tim or 011iver could survive very long if Chuck suddenly disappeared. §

I don't know about you, but I had no idea that Abraham Lincoln was really a robot. The things you learn playing ARGs. Another thing I don't know: how many times "Tim" got hit with the flying lightsaber during filming. I'm quite curious. Someone please remind me to ask during the PM chat.

What's weird about all of this is that I thought that maybe 011iver had been getting better. He tweeted that he was trying to get a date with a Cyborg girl, but maybe because she hasn't confirmed is the reason he's still depressed.

But at least Tim and Chuck have decided to try to help 011ie and get all us internet peeps to help. Because we never come up with bad suggestions about what to do. I suggested a pet or copious amounts of alcohol since robots and Slip-N-Slide's don't mix. But I do like to think my Slip-N-Slide suggestion helped to spawn the idea of getting 011iver a lubejob and a rubdown.

I also had an idea that maybe 011iver could give Tim a creative haircut, but I figured that wouldn't really go over good with Tim. But I get the feeling that Chuck likes the idea of Tim getting a trim. Too bad for her that Tim is fairly oblivious to everything around him. I'm not even sure that pointing out to Tim that Chuck might be a good girl for him would do anything. It would actually probably backfire. Poor Chuck.

Oh! Almost forgot! The Inactiveware Tshirt winners were announced. Lysithea, Jbabbogrin and H( e )X are all going to be receiving free tshirts. And if they provided photos, they'll also become Inactiveware models. Yay!
It's Timmy Time!
In the Deep Blues video, Tim mentioned that the reason he didn't know anything was wrong with 011iver was because he been busy with his new business that's taking off. For some reason, I kept forgetting to ask Tim what this new business was. Luckily, Dante found it through the related videos from Pastor Ned's Second Sermon.

Tim's new business is called Super Great Ideas and he gives Super Great Ideas to companies for money. Or at least that's what he claims. I don't know if he's actually gotten paid for anything yet or not. I will admit that the url is a pretty good one. I bet he could probably sell that after this is all over with for some cash.

His first great idea is for Pizza Hut: Crust Lovers Pizza. He's giving it out as a freebie. I guess he wants to get them hooked on his great ideas and then start charging them obscene amounts of money for additional ones. I really hope that works out for him. §

This is my new favorite video - at least until the next one comes out. The "Timmy Time!" kills me. Especially when 011iver asks if they can avoid that term. I like how there's a quick cut so you can't see Tim laughing at that. And wow - does Tim look different with a different hairstyle and sans beard. Less geeky and more, I dunno, Jehovah Witness like? Maybe it's just the shirt and tie. But I can kinda see why Chuck would want him to shave.
Gospel #3
Pastor Ned's third Gospel is up. Today he's trying to warn us about robotic toys coming to life and killing us. I wonder how he feels about demonic toys, like Chucky. Or, I guess since Chucky actually had electronics in him, it might not have been demonic possession at all. But the Puppetmaster toys I'm pretty sure had no electronics, so what does he have to say about that? §

I'm guessing Pastor Ned hasn't seen the video about the Elmo doll that is now spouting out death threats. I bet he would have that doll strung up from a tree so fast it would make your head spin. Or he would stomp it to death. I would suggest microwaving it, but we all know that Pastor Ned doesn't trust the microwave and would probably fear that the microwaves would make it stronger, like the Hulk. A little furry red Hulk with an annoying voice.

Pastor Ned has also posted a video of a protest of three of his congregation protesting outside of an electronics store. Not that I want to take anything away from their right to protest, but I'm a little bit worried that they might be protesting outside of a closed Circuit City. Or maybe that's the idea, that their protests are so powerful they can bring down an entire chain because robots are evil. I'm sure that's gotta be it.

I feel a bit bad that I'm not helping out Pastor Ned at all. But I can't send in any videos of myself without pissing off 011iver and Tim and Chuck since they know what I look like. I guess I could claim it was one of the nawoR clones, but I don't think I want to really try explaining how there are 983,897 clones out there thanks to strifey's workshop.

What I decided to do instead was create some PDFs for Pastor Ned that maybe people could print up and hand out. These were inspired by the lovely flyers that were handed out during the Stop TARP ARG at SXSW. I have two versions: a plain one that you could print out on different colored papers and one with a robot background. So if you would like to print them out and give them to unsupsecting people, be my guest!
Timmy Time Scrabble Challenge
Since Chuck beat Tim in the game of Zombies, he's been looking for a new game that he could beat her at. Connect Four is out of the question. Tim says he's burnt out on it, but based on the photographic and video evidence, I'd say it's because he sucks at it.

Chuck then suggested Scrabble and Tim agreed to her challenge. One problem (besides Tim's spelling ability) - he lost the Scrabble board at a bar. So the Scrabble challenge was put on hold until Tim could pony up some money and buy a new game.

That is until Gupfee suggested that they find an online version so we all could play. Tim and 011ie both liked this idea and I found us a pretty decent site to play on:

I played a test game with Dirt_Diver to check out the functionality of the site. I also kicked his butt, but that's besides the point. If you are setting up a game, I would recommend the following settings:
Game Setup
  • Game Name: Whatever you'd like
  • Public Game: I'd suggest "No - password protected" to keep random people from stealing seats.
  • Game Password: If you password protect the game, make the password something easy, like "mbilf"
  • Your Player Name: Self-explanatory
  • Rejoin Password: Temporary password to rejoin the game in case the browser closes. I'd pick something disposable in case you couldn't play any longer and wanted to hand your seat to someone else.
Advanced Options
  • Use Dictonary: OSPD4 seemed to work well during the test game
  • Require Valid Words: No. This will allow you to challenge words. Otherwise, you have to play valid words all the time.
  • Allow Spectators: Yes. The rest of us want to see what's going on.
  • Spectators Can Chat: Yes. The default is No, so be sure to switch it so that Spectators can chat along with the players.
Advanced Options 2
  • Turn Time Limit: No. Unless you would like a faster paced game.
  • Free 'Bad Rack' Swap: No. Suck it up.
  • Disable In-Game Confirmations: Yes. The default is No, so be sure to switch this. It's really annoying to have to click twice to accept words.
We haven't set up a time yet for the Great Timmy Time Scrabble Challenge, but I'm sure it'll be posted around once it's decided upon.

Update: The Great Timmy Time Scrabble Tournament is being held Thursday, June 4, 2009 at 9pm on If you would like to be a part of it, make sure to email 011iver at and he'll add you to the bracket. I may or may not be participtating depending on the number of other people signed up.
011ie's Video Responses
011ie decided that because so many people sent him video responses (13S113, H(e)x, Dirt Diver, and Fanny and Zephyr) that he would return the favor. I especially laughed at the Fanny and Zephyr response, and not just because I'm the one that sent in the fan video in the first place. §

These videos do leave me with some questions though. For one, why does Tim seemingly have a subscription to the AARP magazine? Secondly, was the placement of 011iver under the oh-so-incredibly-awesome-I-want-a-copy vampire poster intentional? I thought it was pretty funny during the Fanny video. But with the later videos, I couldn't tell if it was a suggestion of sexual activity or if the idea was that 011ie just sucks. I hope its not the latter because 011ie is awesome.

Thirdly, why didn't the sexy microwave get a video response? Is it because she lives on top of Tim and 011ie's microwave that 011ie just doesn't notice her? Or maybe she's just too demanding of him in the mornings when he goes to warm up a cup of coffee. If 011ie is anything like Tim though, I'd bet he just doesn't notice what's right under his nose. Too busy setting up dates with humans and cyborgs to see the microwave right in front of his face.

And finally, who is this cyborg chick that 011ie is gonna go out on a date with? Is she on RFF? Has she sent in a video to him? Will their date at the zoo last longer than my date at the park? I'm not jealous that he's going out with someone else, but I will be jealous if she gets to spend a lot more time with him on their first date than I did on mine.
Tube Taco
Timmy has a new great idea, this time for Taco Bell. It's the Tube Taco! Which is like a hotdog made out of hamburger stuffed inside a hard taco shell. §

Sadly, this video has a few problems that we should address. For starters: THERE IS NO TIMMY TIME! What the fuck, Tim? How the hell could you cut out the Timmy Time? I even made it my ringtone for when I get text messages, it's that awesome! For a "Super Great Ideas" man, you really dropped the ball on this one. I'm not sure if you thought the balloon could make up for the lack of Timmy Time, and while it's pretty nifty, it doesn't really compare. The loss of the Timmy Time almost made me miss that the video is backwards for 90% of the time. At first I thought you had just redecorated and moved the awesome vampire poster, but then it became clear that you just had the video flipped. But still, this is not as upsetting to me as the loss of Timmy Time is. BRING BACK TIMMY TIME!
Scrabble Championship
So on Thursday night, we had our Scrabble tourney. Since we had more people than what 011ie originally bracketed for, we had 3 prelim games before the finale. I played a game with Timmy and DirtDiver. I lost miserably because I kept getting a ton of vowels and DirtDiver kept stealing all my spots. Tim ended up winning our game and made it into the championship, along with Chuck, Jain (the wildcard) and RedCt (who spanked 011ie's ass). RedCt ended up kicking everyone's ass in the championship game, and thus was declared the Scrabble Champion. This is despite the fact that Tim tried to play the word "Ruggie" on a triple word score space to close the gap on RedCt. Even though the word was denied, it did spawn his next Super Great Idea: The Ruggie.

The game was a lot of fun. 011ie and Tim had a webcam up for a little while before the game started. We got to see both Tim and 011ie dancing, and even got to hear 011ie sing in the background. I really think he needs to go out for karaoke at some point in time. We also found out who 011ie has his next date with. Her name is Max and she's a cyborg on RFF. She's really pretty. I'm trying not to be jealous.
Countdown Ending
After the Scrabble tourney, there was nothing really to do until the wewillalwayshave/paris.html countdown ended at 10pm on Saturday, June 6th. Promptly at 10pm, the site updated with a link to a YouTube video. It turns out, Lugnut has a sense of humor as he RickRoll'd us. Stupid ass bot. Luckily, there was a comment in the source code that this wasn't just a random RickRolling: I told you I'd be back.

Checking out werenostrangersto/love.html gives us a hint as to the next page that has a login: werenostrangersto/security. The user name is Astley and password is the number of times people spin in the RickRoll video. Oi. I gave up trying to count because a: I wasn't sure if I was counting spins or just people spinning, b: I wasn't sure what exactly counted as a spin and c: sometimes it was hard to count how many times they really spun around. Instead, I just started inputting numbers as the password, hoping that it wasn't spelled out and I'd have to go back and try again. Luckily, it turned out there are 22 spins in the RickRoll video. I actually have gone back through the video and counted, and I got 19, so I was going to have to start randomly guessing answers anyway, so I don't feel too badly about taking a shortcut there.
Username: Astley
Password: 22
We're No Strangers to Security
It seems that while he was still on the MBILF/RFF servers, Lugnut found a letter from Carol Coldoil to some unknown individual detailing some of his plans for RobotFriendFinder - and it doesn't sound good. Remember how in the intro video to RFF that Coldoil talks about having "over 0011001100110110 [36] characteristics" to match robots? It seems they want to use those 36 characteristics in order to make some process more efficient. Right now the site is only in beta, which is they haven't asked for all 36 characteristics, but they will be soon. He's going to send out an updated Terms of Service, hoping that no one will read it too closely. And if for some odd chance that they do, he'll just issue an "I'm Sorry" like Facebook did over the whole 'we now own your content' fiasco. §

Don't know who the letter is addressed to, but it doesn't sound like Coldoil started RFF out of the goodness of his heart to help find robots their true soulbots. It doesn't even sound like he likes robots that much if he's referring to them as "they" and calling them "apathetic" and "lemmings". We're going to have to keep an eye out for this updated terms of service.
Gospel #4
Just as we were all winding down from finding the letter from Coldoil that Lugnut uploaded, then we found out that Pastor Ned uploaded a new gospel. Yay! Today we get to see Pastor Ned in his exercise gear as he makes sure that the DICS Church has enough power stored in their batteries. §

Okay, this 36 stuff is beginning to freak me out. First we have Coldoil talking 36 robot characteristics, and now Pastor Ned is spouting off about 36 disciples. Are they connected somehow? Stranger things have happened. But what really scares me (Yes, Pastor Ned, I am scared) is that there was one other time that 36 was brought up - and that was in my date with 011iver. Tim rated my cookies as a 36 out of 36. (011iver rated the cider stickiness as 34 out of 36 but I'm guessing he was just using Tim's 'wacky' scale.) Why is Tim rating stuff out of 36? Is he connected to Coldoil or Pastor Ned? Is he going to sacrifice 011iver? Is he secretly working Coldoil and using 011ie as a guinea pig in whatever scheme Coldoil has set up? Or is he really one of Pastor Ned's disciples and is working to bring down robotkind by befriending one and thus infiltrating the robot community? Or was it just a quirk of Tim's and I'm just jumping at shadows. I hope it's just a quirk. I like Tim. He's really grown on me as the videos have progressed. I don't want Tim to betray 011ie. That would be so sad. 011ie doesn't deserve to be turned on like that by his best friend. Don't be evil, Timmy. Stay good. Please.
Continue to Page 3 >>

See the Intro page for a list of all the websites, plus brief information about this guide and the game.